i wanted to be burried alive.
it is not an understatement of how i felt that day.
imagine standing infront of a crowd, speechless, nervous, looking at cue cards in english but cant even read them. i was worst then the secondary 1s who were presenting.
i injured my pride, my ego, all that i stood for.
i damaged the reputation of the institude that i was once from, i made sure that pupils from the BEST primary school in my neighbourhood choose NOT to choose the very institute that i marketed.
i let down the very teacher who recco me for the job.
this is how i felt: ASHAMED, ashamed of myself for all i've done.
and the only thing i could do is chew on a subway sandwich like nothing ever happened.
thanks for the opportunity, but sorry abt screwing it up.
drown me, bury me, yes.mayb just kill me.
...........
today was suppose to be really really really fun, i mean, i get to meet the sevens, who were previously MY LIFE.
although things have changed, and we're currently left with like FIVE people, there is a certain importance to this gathering.
feeling nostalgia, YES. But the very thought of my failed atempt in marketing killed me and burnt my heart.
BUT, it was a cosy feeling. Like chasing after a much sought after past, like we were back in those days in UNITY. Like we were still a year younger. Like it was just after school and we wanted to take a break frm preparing for Os.
this is how life should be. With them.
so fresh yet so farmiliar, so innocent yet so indepth.
i just wanna say i really miss you guys, and when i get sick and scared and afraid of whatever i have in the life im leading now, i turn to you.
........
mummy, im sick and tired and there's no one like you to comfort me.
i miss u so much im having so many dreams of you.
when will work settle?
