["Near To You" by A Fine Frenzy]
This week is "bump-into-all-your-crushes week".
Bumping into Mr Copy-writer from XX advert company and Mr Geeky whom I was obsessed about for 3 years in Ngee Ann, was a pleasant surprise. No actually it was more than pleasant, it induced a mild adrenalin, the kind that brings about a euphoria.
Looking back they were dumb crushes, but they made my day.
A chance encounter on the bus, being trapped in the lift together - they were very much movie-like except that it did not blossom into some kind of fairytale ending, or start, for the matter. I guess we needed so much more than the power of coincidence, I guess we needed a spark. (AH it so did not happen).
Mr Geeky threw me a salute as I went down the stairs, and him, up the escalator. He was adorable. It was as if I took a glimpse into the past, one that pumped a wave of nostalgia into my heart.
Mr Copywriter is his usual smiley self, reserved but sincere, he hasn't changed but boy HAVE I CHANGED.
....
"Baby" has come back to me. It its tangible self, it was the best thought of the day.
This hall magazine kept me smiling all night. I savoured every page of the magazine in quick glances, every moment tasted like a delicacy. Sheer delight. A success. A True Success by my Standards.
Prior to receiving my bundle of joy–the hall magazine–I went through a mind gruelling 9am-6.30pm in school.
Stuck with thoughts that could only be deciphered by some kind of higher order.
But I came to a conclusion.
My passion is cheap, my love is real but something's gonna give.
There's no fragment of light at the end of the tunnel, no chance this decision requires any further thought.
On my declaration form there will be one name, and one name only.
And it's not going to be "Journalism". No more journalism modules (unless it's design related).
I will write as an indulgence, I will write to fill up a space in the paper, I will edit for a greater cause, but it will never be a passion.
Now listed under "hobbies", it will be a part of my life I bury along with those overflowing thoughts of Ngee Ann. (Don't get me wrong, I'm not burying the NP experience, but just the unbearable feeling that it will never be like the way it was).
I mentally dug a grave and buried "Journalism".
As I prepared for an interview, I arranged my portfolio with a one-track mind and put my journalist pieces right at the very end. It has become something I disclose with much unease. PR WRITING PLEASE!
